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Ask Him These 5 Revealing Questions

  This could be the beginning of something wonderful. You really care about him. You want to be part of his life. But a few things he’s said bother you. He’s got some complicated issues in his life… And he doesn’t want you to become involved. You have a few complicated issues in your own life… And you’re not sure how much he wants to know about them. Should you sit down with him and have a serious talk? Or should you let it go and have faith it will all work out in the end? Surely, if you love each other enough, you’ll be able to make it work no matter what… right? No one wants to look too closely at potential problems when they’re falling for someone. They don’t want to derail the relationship before it’s even begun. But some couples are trying a different tactic. They’re laying their differences out on the table from the beginning. And I’ve got 5 questions you can use to start that conversation in a safe and playful way. Perfection Isn’t Persuasive When you meet someone new, you don’
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5 Ways Men Express Love

For Victoria, getting an “I love you” from her partner was like getting blood from a turnip. She could count on one hand the number of times he’d said it. She said it to him all the time. She was always thinking of little ways to show she cared. Yet he just assumed she knew how he felt. “I wouldn’t be with you if I didn’t love you,” he told her once. It seemed to her that he took her for granted. She didn’t want to be in a relationship where she never knew how he felt. She wanted romance and reassurances. She wanted long conversations. Instead it felt like their relationship centered on practical things. What needed doing, what was happening, what the weather would be tomorrow. She didn’t  need  to know the weather. She needed to know he loved her. The Feelings Problem Feelings are a problem for 9 out of 10 couples. (Totally made up statistic, but I’ll bet it’s close.) In a nutshell, the Feelings Problem is this: She expresses her feelings… and he doesn’t. He sometimes wishes she would

3 Casual Dating Traps to Avoid

You thought you made it clear. You told him you wanted a relationship. And he agreed! He said he wanted a relationship, too. You believed him. But you’ve been seeing him for a while now, and you’re still not sure where this is going. He compliments you but never says how he feels about you. He says he wants to take it day by day, but you want to make plans for the future. He is eager to jump into bed, but never around when you just want to hang out. Did you get your wires crossed somewhere? Or is it actually taking him this long to decide whether he wants a relationship with you? Casual Dating Is Just So  Easy Most people take the path of least resistance. If everything is going well, why change it? Why risk having a difficult conversation? If your guy seems happy but hasn’t brought up the topic of a relationship yet, it may have nothing to do with whether he likes  you . He may just like  the way things are. If you want a relationship, you can’t let casual dating become the status quo

Why He Keeps Coming Back But Won’t Commit

“It’s not you. It’s me.” “I’m worried I’m going to hurt you.” “You deserve someone better than me.” “I can’t give you what you need.” If you’ve been on the receiving end of those excuses, you know just how frustrating they are. Doesn’t he get it? You WANT to be with him. You know he’s not perfect. You know he can’t give you the world. And you don’t care! Love is accepting people for who they are. You can’t help but think there’s something you can say to him… Some way to make him understand… You’ve got a really good thing going here. Can’t he see that? When clients come to me, heartbroken over a man who leaves them as often as he stays, I always wish I could fix it for them. The first thing I tell them is the good news. The good news is that he’s clearly getting pleasure out of spending time with you. If he wasn’t getting any pleasure, he wouldn’t be coming back. So he does experience the good bits of your relationship. There’s only one problem: He’s not willing to stick around for the

4 Ways to Make Him Attached to You

Perhaps you’ve been with a guy like this. He wants to spend time with you—sometimes. He says how much he loves you—sometimes. He makes future plans with you—sometimes. Other times, he isn’t there at all. He doesn’t call. He doesn’t text. He drops off the face of the planet. You get the feeling that he only wants to be with you when  he  feels like it… Not when you need him. The diagnosis? Your guy might be suffering from a lack of attachment. What Is Attachment? Attachment is a key component of lasting love. Compared to passion and intimacy, attachment takes time to build. You can feel instant attraction towards someone. It might take you a little longer before you feel safe sharing your deepest self with him. But it will take you some time before you feel  attached  to this person. Attachment has a very specific scientific meaning. The  attachment system  in the brain was designed to keep children and their caretakers close. Young children wouldn’t survive unless they had an innate dr