Breaking up rips out your heart. It hurts SO much. You can’t think of him without crying. Your friends try to support you, but it doesn’t help. The pain inside you is tearing you apart, yet everyone expects you to go about your normal life as if nothing happened… As if it was “just” a breakup… Rather than a huge chunk of your life ripped out, leaving a gaping wound. The anguish of a breakup is very real. When you think about your ex, specific parts of the brain light up: parts related to physical pain and distress as well as (surprisingly) craving and addiction. [1] Think about someone who’s decided to quit smoking. Sometimes they can distract themselves from their cravings. But other times the need to have another cigarette becomes overpowering. They feel flooded by obsessive thoughts and intense cravings. Breakups can be like that, too. Sometimes you can distract yourself from the pain for a short while. But then the obsessive thoughts and intense craving for him comes back, and you

Article from  dating coach  James Bauer [1] "A few years back, I was at a picnic when an old friend of mine came and sat down next to me. “James!” she said, and gave me a huge hug. Annabeth had been a good friend of mine for a long time. I asked her how she was, and she caught me up on her life. Then she nudged my arm and pointed across the lawn at a tall blond man. “And there’s my new guy,” she told me. “Callum. Nearly six months now.” “Congratulations!” I said. I noticed a shadow cross her face, and I thought I knew why. It hadn’t escaped my notice that Callum was surrounded by several women, all laughing and hanging on his every word. Annabeth lowered her voice. “James, you know about this stuff. Whenever we go to events like this, Callum always goes off on his own and ignores me. I know it shouldn’t bother me—I know it’s harmless.” She sighed. “But it would be nice if he’d pay some attention to me. Any ideas?” A Change in Perspective Because Annabeth was such a good friend, I

As much as  online dating   is a ton of work without much reward, it does teach you a lot about human nature. The way men present themselves when you meet them for the first time is INCREDIBLY revealing. Pay attention, and you’ll start to notice patterns. There seems to be a common script that many guys follow. It goes like this… 1. They drop comments about their wealth or status. Think of the guy who wants you to know he has a Maserati in his garage back home, or that he’s got an inside connection who get you backstage at the next concert. 2. They drop comments about the life you could expect if you were their girlfriend. Think of the guy who explains in great detail how well he treats his girlfriends, or how he’s got a holiday home at the beach that he could take you to. 3. Sometimes, they drop provocative comments to see if you’ll react. Think of the guy who mentions that he listens to Howard Stern, or the guy who says he doesn’t understand the fuss about waiting for sex when you’ve

When you meet someone really cool… And you seem to have a connection, and he seems to like you back… It’s the best feeling in the world. You can’t stop smiling. You feel so happy. Your world, ordinarily so predictable, sparkles with hope and possibility. What if this is it? What if he’s the one? It’s even sweeter because of how hard you’ve worked to get here. You’ve put up with so many bad dates and duds and jerks. Meeting a guy like him is like hitting the jackpot. He’s interesting, he’s funny, he’s cute, AND he feels the same way about you! How often does THAT happen? So you are NOT going to let this guy go. You are going to do everything in your power to make sure this works. But then… Three weeks later… He stops messaging you. You casually ask what’s going on. Are things busy for him? Did he not see your messages? His reply is brief. It tells you nothing. Your heart starts racing. You know exactly what’s happening. He’s pulling away. If you don’t do something now, you’re going to l