Skip to main content

5 (Surprising!) Things Men Want from Women

We all know what we THINK men want. They want someone who’s young and gorgeous and thinks the sun shines out of their you-know-what.
Just look at the profiles that get the most action on online dating sites…If you’re fun and light-hearted, and you’re cute when you giggle, and you make him feel like a man, you’re in.

But is that REALLY true? There’s another side to men…

A side you don’t often see.

In my work with couples, I see men at their most vulnerable. I see them when their hearts are on the line. What I see goes to the heart of what men TRULY crave in intimate relationships.

And it’s not what you think…

#1. He wants to know he won’t get hurt.

We can sometimes think that we’re the only ones who get hurt in relationships.

Men don’t care. They don’t feel heartbreak. They just go out and get drunk and find a new girlfriend.

There’s some evidence for that. A 2015 study found that women may experience slightly more pain after a breakup than men do, but the difference is negligible.

The most important thing the study revealed was a curious difference in how men and women process a breakup.

Men, on the other hand, just move on. They skip the processing. That means they carry the pain with them for longer—a LOT longer.

As one guy put it:

" What do women do when their heart is broken? They talk about it! But men are more likely to keep it to themselves and suffer.”

Chances are, every man you date will have had his heart broken at least once. He may not talk about it. He may never admit it.

But there’s always going to be that question in the back of his mind:

Will you hurt him, too?

It’s a serious question. Because we do hurt each other. And sometimes we do it without even realizing it.

#2. He wants to know you like him.

Of course you like him, right? But I don’t mean like that.

I mean as a person.

Sometimes men feel—and I’m generalizing here—that women only pretend to like them when, in actual fact, the minute he’s not there, all the women get together and talk trash about their boyfriends.

Men overhear the way some women talk about their partners. They can’t help but wonder if their girlfriend is doing the same thing.

Guys are vulnerable. It doesn’t feel loving when they’re made fun of.

When a woman talks about how all guys are this or all guys are that, her partner can’t help but feel she’s talking about him. And it doesn’t feel good.

#3. He wants to be taken care of.

Yes, men want to be taken care of, too! I think we ALL want to be taken care of.

But here’s the secret:

He wants to feel taken care of in a way that makes him feel like a king, not like a little boy.

As women, we often default into mothering mode. We want to make sure he eats right, goes to the doctor, picks up his room, and looks after himself.

But that doesn’t feel like nurturing to him. It feels more like control.

When you think about taking care of your man, think about how you’d like him to take care of you.

You don’t need someone to take care of your physical needs. What you want someone who cares about your emotional needs. You want him to listen to you, to be there when you need someone to lean on.

That’s what your guy wants, too. He wants to know you’re there for him. He wants to know you have his back.

#4. He wants to be understood.

The average guy doesn’t spend a lot of time psychoanalyzing people.

When guys get together and talk to each other, they tend to stick to safe subjects rather than opening their hearts and sharing their fears and vulnerabilities.

Thanks to men’s groups, that’s slowly changing.

But for many guys, the only place that’s genuinely safe for him to let down his guard and say how he truly feels is in his relationship.

It’s hard for us women to imagine just how valuable that is for a man.

We have girlfriends who create those safe spaces for us.

But your guy may not have anyone but you that he can really talk to.

So make your relationship a safe space for difficult conversations. Practice skills like empathetic listening and emotional validation. Learn to hold space even if you don’t like what he’s saying.

#5. He wants to be unconditionally loved.

I couldn’t sign off without including this one.

It’s not surprising, but it needs to be in here.

Men want to be loved for who they are, not what they bring to a relationship.

They don’t want to be told that they’d better live up to their girlfriend’s high standards, or they’re out.

Unconditionally loving all of a man—not just the parts you like—is hard, but you can’t build a lifetime together on conditional love.

For more tips on how to give a man what he secretly craves, grab your free copy of this report!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Secret to Instant Sex Appeal

Would you rather  look  sexier or  feel   sexier?  What if you could have BOTH? You can. And no matter if you’re currently single or happily dating, the effect on your love life can be profoundly positive. There are many ways to feel sexier.  But one of the simplest ways is the tried and true cosmetic, lipstick. Psychologists have known about the “lipstick effect” for a while. The term was coined after the Great Depression when cosmetic sales soared despite limited financial resources. [1]  It was later confirmed as a legitimate trend. But not without some backlash. A few years ago, a group of researchers argued that women only try to make themselves more attractive to secure a mate.  [2]  The theory was understandable unsettling, as it suggested women will do whatever’s necessary just to find a man. But a recent study has revealed something new. A team of Harvard researchers found that women actually perform cognitive tasks  better...
Post a Comment
Read more

12 words that trigger a man’s love response - secret signal

If your man is hot or cold, acting distant or putting you last on the priority list then you will definitely want to see this. Did you know there’s a 12 word sentence you can say to your man... that will trigger intense feelings of love and instinctual attraction for you deep within his chest? Because hidden in these 12 words is a “secret signal” that fuels a man’s instinct to love, please and protect you with all his heart... >> 12 Words That Trigger A Man’s Love Response   " I've realized I won't be happy without you in my life" This instinct is so hardwired into a man’s genetics that it will drive him to work harder than ever before to make your relationship the best part of both of your lives. In fact, triggering this powerful instinct is so important to having the best possible relationship with your man that once you send your man one of these “Secret Signals”... ...You’ll immediately notice him open his mind and heart to you in a way...
1 comment
Read more

The Attraction Trip-Wire that Awakens a Man’s Deepest Longing for Love

Trip Wire: “A hidden trigger that sets off a series of explosive events.” Deep within the heart of every man is an intense longing to be someone’s hero. This longing has ancient origins. You see,the cause of this longing is written into the very fabric of his DNA. And there it lies, dormant… until one day, the right trigger unleashes its power. I’d like to show you how to become that trigger, and how   to awaken the full force your man’s bonding instinct. But first, a story. It’s the story of human connection.  Before we can care deeply about someone, we must know something about their life story. Because stories evoke empathy.  Stories allow us to picture ourselves in someone else’s shoes.  Stories form the foundation of all human connection. They create the sensation of one shared life experience. It’s strange, but true, that we can even find ourselves rooting for thieves and criminals so long as we see their story unfold. Movies like  ...
Post a Comment
Read more