If you want a long-term relationship, you look for a man who says he wants one, too.
If you want to get married someday, you look for a man who says he wants to get married someday, too.
But what a man says isn’t necessarily what he does.
You can find yourself with a man who says he wants a long-term relationship but acts more interested in short-term gratification.
So how do you spot those guys who genuinely want something lasting?
Are there clues that reveals a man’s long-term potential?
Yes!
Look for these 3 clues to determine whether a man has what it takes to make love last.
Clue #1. He Works at His Relationships
You can’t expect a relationship to be there only when it’s convenient.
Relationships take work.
Sometimes they’re a lot more work than fun.
That goes for all relationships, not just romantic ones.
You know that if you hardly ever make time for the people in your life, if you rarely ask them about their lives, and if you don’t make thoughtful gestures, your relationships will grow cold.
But not everyone knows this.
Some men feel that relationships take up a lot of time and energy that could be spent elsewhere.
They prefer the fun part of dating. They lose interest once a relationship becomes “hard.”
As a result, some women feel pressured to keep their man’s attention by always being “the fun one” and never letting him see their problems.
They don’t realize that their efforts backfire.
Yes, they keep this man coming back for more. But they never get to see whether he has what it takes to support them.
Don’t be afraid of letting a man see the real you. Give him an opening to support you.
It can be as simple as sharing some difficult feelings you’re having or a problem you can’t resolve.
The wrong man will shut down or change the subject. He might even break up with you!
But not the right man.
The right man will want to share the struggles of life as well as the fun.
Clue #2. He Admires Married Couples
Some guys say they want to be married someday…
But then you notice how they talk about marriage.
They make fun of married couples. They see marriage as an institution from an outdated era.
If a man doesn’t see any married couples as role models, then it’s unlikely he’ll be saving for a wedding ring.
Marriage-minded men have thought long and hard about what kind of marriage they’d like to have.
They can tell you the kind of marriage they most admire and point to examples.
They know that marriage has bad parts as well as good. It’s not all a walk in the park.
(In fact, if a man paints an overly rosy view of marriage, that’s also a bad sign. It means he’s not prepared for the difficulties of married life.)
A marriage-minded man has thought carefully about the conditions that have to be in place in his life before he gets married.
He may want to be financially secure or established in his career.
He doesn’t want to make promises he can’t keep, so he may not impress you as much as the bold dreamer who paints a beautiful picture of the amazing life you could lead together.
The more realistic and clear-minded he is about marriage, the more you can trust him when he says that it’s one of the most important goals in his life.
Clue #3. He Faces What’s Wrong in Your Relationship
When you’re in love, you don’t want to admit that anything could be wrong.
You want to believe that everything is perfect. You’ll always get along. Love will fix everything.
You can hold onto this myth so tightly that you don’t see the cliff you’re headed straight towards.
A man who wants a future with you will be looking.
He’s planning for the future. He’s looking for any obstacles that might lie ahead.
He knows that obstacles don’t disappear through wishful thinking.
He wants to have a plan. He wants to talk about potential problems.
He wants you both to have your feet firmly on the ground, so you’re realistic about what lies ahead if you choose to spend your lives together.
It can be disconcerting when the man you love brings up problems in your relationship and wants to talk about how you’re going to deal with them.
It can feel as if he’s criticizing you and doubting the relationship.
But be heartened.
It’s a good sign that he’s talking about problems rather than pushing them under the carpet.
Facing your problems means he’s serious about the relationship. He wants to make it work.
And you’ll need all of that honesty and openness for the myriad challenges that married life throws at you.
Rom-coms have led us to believe that true love starts with a meet-cute and overwhelming feelings of passion. Sometimes that’s true.
But just remember this one thing…
It endures because of hard work, realistic expectations, and the willingness to face challenges together.
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